

I always get jealous when I see a gay couple because they always look happier than me
When the people next to me in the pool are in the water, I smell their towels
I only play online as a female character to get gifts from guys. I'm a guy myself
I slipped and fell on the dance floor at the disco





I intentionally don't flush public toilets to leave my mark
I invent illnesses to avoid seeing my boyfriend's parents
I once caught someone stealing in a shop and offered the detective to do everything he would like to avoid calling the police

I lick the exposed cutlery in restaurants when no one sees it

Sometimes I like to go deep into the woods and make all the animal noises to make the forest wanna get into it.

My mother has many shoes. When she's not around, I put them on, especially high heels, and take selfies with them.
While my husband thinks I'm going to the gym, I gorge myself at Burgerking


